Reviewing the Beyonce CD!

The lovely Lizzi gave me the album "4", the newest album from Beyonce. For the longest time I didn't really respect her but after I heard one song from the album I have full fledged respect for her. I used to be more of an Alicia Keys woman...man.....thing. Anyways, here's some commentary on each and every song. Except the remixes.
1+1-This song is ok....to me it's kind of whiny and sex desperate. Ahee.
I Care-I thoroughly enjoyed this. It was so feisty and Black woman infused.
I Miss You-Hmm, I don't think I've really listened to to this one that much because I a) have no general ideas about this song OR b) it's a forgettable song. I don't really know.
Best Thing I Never Had-Story of my life. Actually, story of me and Shahil.
Rather Die Young-I used to not really like it but it really grew on me. Partially because it was all soulful but had that 90's RB feel sort of.
Start Over-The beat in the beginning automatically made me like the song. It's really simple but I just liked it. A lot.
Love On Top-Pretty much the first song Lizzi showed me that gave Beyonce a chance. This song is amazing......with all those key changes that get irritating because she makes me feel like a tone deaf walrus. Which I am.
Countdown-It sounds like she's saying "me and my BOOB BOOB BOOB BOOB" or boof. Or poof. and it is quite TITillating. See what I did-Never mind.
End Of Time-This was a a good song too! Though I wonder if she was thinking about Jay-z while writing all of these songs. I know she probably didn't (and she probably had other people write them for her) but haha every time I think about Jay-z for these songs I feel like Beyonce is super bi-polar >.<
I Was Here-One of the more "depressing" songs on the album. I liked this one too. GOTTA HAVE SOME VARIETY. I feel like this song would play in a K drama. Or if America had soap operas modeled after K dramas, this would totally be in it when the main character tries to DIE. Nah, the main character never dies, it's usually the elderly dad or grandpa.
Run the World-Okay, I don't understand how this one is the most popular. It sucks the biggest, juiciest donkey balls ever. Well it's not that bad but no matter how hard I try to listen to it, it still never grows on me. This shows how bad the music taste of generic Americans are.
Party ft. Andre 3000-At first the rap was kind of "wut?". "Gurrrrl ahhll make milk drip down yo' knees"...BUT this grew on me super quickly. And I love it so much. This one has the most prominent 90's RB feel to it PLUS it kind of reminds me of a female underage version of Let's Get It On by the sultry Marvin Gaye. Marvin Gaye's dad killed Marvin. Slut. Andre 3000 was in Outkast. Which means he sang the 'hey ya' song. Now how 'bout that trivia!
And there's the bonus tracks:
Lay Up Under Me: The song was alright, but I LOVED the title. I was like "oh snap gurl. Beyonce dominates......IN BED." It reminded me of Robin Scherbatsky.
Schoolin' Life: This song had an 80's anthem feel to it, and I loved it a lot. I actually haven't been listening to it recently, which is weird, but I'll get to it soon. I'm getting distracted by Kpop. Which is Kenyan pop.
Dance For You-Meh. Definitely about lap dancing. And the lyrics sort of creep me out, mainly cause I lay awake in bed listening to this album at night.

So the end!
My top five of this album would definitely be
Love On Top, Schoolin' Life, Party, I Care, and Rather Die Young.

Here's the rather sekahsee cover of the album.


Okay, for the longest time I didn't know it was called "4".
.__.

Come a Little Bit Closer, Bay-beh.

Can you finish the lyrics? You probably can't. But I can! Stupid bastard. This is why I, Natafee am going to reinforce your knowledge of the groundbreaking 90's Brit girl group, The.....SPICE GIRLS!

The Spice Girls were and are still amazing. Back then, there songs were hailed and performed and covered by teenagers like you and me, usually in the room with a mediocre boombox and a hairbrush as a makeshift microphone. Now? People like Justin Boobie- I mean Bieber and that lady with candy breasts have taken over the music industry. But this, my friends....is pop at it's best.


First off and my personal favorite (Sorry, Lizzi) is Sporty Spice aka Melanie Chisholm. Sporty Spice was not the flashiest dresser, did not seem as sexy and charming as the others, but had a powerful and unique singing voice and is probably the best singer in the group. She could hit high notes like a wicked opera singer on LSD and it was amazing. She also has a charming Irish accent and actually had a really nice, pretty face that was natural and not caked with makeup. Cough. Geri. Plus, she had an 8 pack. Mrrow. The only bad thing was that after the Spice Girl's broke up, she chopped her long brown ponytail and traded it in for a Ellen Degeneres esque lesbo pixie cut.

My second favorite of the Spice Girls would be Scary Spice, Melanie Brown. She was a foxy black girl who loved screaming and scaring goldfish and wore provocative and innovative outfits, most of them being tight and leopard related. She also has a lovely Leeds accent and looks quite fabulous in platform boots and astronaut suits. She also is intelligent and not a whore, because she looks sekahsee all the time. I like her soothing voice but sometimes I think that she should've been given Sporty Spice's more powerful parts in the songs to give her voice a more "scary" feel, because to me, she has a scary, awesome look and personality, but her voice isn't rising above and doing crazy things. Her raps are quite hardcore though. Not hating on Scary though, because duh, she's my second favorite.

My third favorite was the adorable Baby Spice, Emma Bunton. Baby Spice was awesome because she could totally pull off the cute innocent WHORE look. She had the cute pigtails and girly smile and lollipop, but dressed like a total kinderwhore. I love it. I think she's the only white girl to pull off that look. You see, if you bought a slutty french maid costume and gave it to any random girl on the streets, she would look like a......prostitute. But on the other hand, if you gave it to Miz Bunton, she would just look like......Baby Spice! And I love her face. It's so cute and chubby and I want to pinch it. I still do...because she still pretty much looks like that. Except wears more conservative clothing. Oh well, she can rock a sweater vest as much as I can rock me some nice sweatpants.

My fourth favorite would be Posh Spice, otherwise known as VICTORIA BECKHAM! Before she was married to the douchey soccer player, she was Victoria Adams, with a snooty London accent. She had the best fashion sense in the whole group and was probably one of the people who caused teenage girls to go anorexic. Besides Twiggy. She had a firy temper about her clothing and probably spat on polyester. People say that she couldn't sing but damnit, she was in the Spice Girls! Of course you had to have above average chops to be in that group! She has a pretty, low voice and it fits nicely when she sang the bottom vocals in the "get it on" part in 2 Become 1. It was a sultry 4 seconds.

Last and very much the least would be Ginger Spice, Geri Halliwell. There are many reasons why I dislike her.
1. Her name is Geri, very much like "Jeri" which is the name of my band director.
2. She did nothing except flash her boobies and dance around in panties or booty shorts.
3. Had a slimy, mucus-y voice
4. Wasn't a real ginger...like my band director. Their hair is actually QUITE similar.
5. Resembles my band director a lot. Pasty, fake gingers, blonde highlights, pretty chunky.
6. Was the one who pretty much broke the Spice Girls up.
She was usually the favorite, making people swoon with her sultriness but to me, her sultry factor is the same as a baboon's.

And to sum it all up, they made a MOVIE! It was great, but according to IMBD it sucked. Well, it didn't. It screamed GIRL POWER! more than a Riot Grrl song.